Avast! There be more than monsters in these waters.Jon, Lilly and the crew find themselves trapped in the elven realm of Aquris. Unable to reach the portal that would take them back to Urth, they must sail into dangerous waters and think of a way to get back to Jon's realm in one piece.Can the crew of the Dark Heart survive a sinister plot, monsters and a mysterious power none have seen in eons? Will their honor and values be strong enough to return home and fight the iron grip of the Empire? Will Lilly keep her crew together as they face insurmountable odds? Will Jon discover another piece of his destiny and get his boxers back?My Girlfriends are Pirate Elves! contains humor, outlandish adventure, sea battles, some cursing, crab soup, swashbuckling, pointed ears, magical pistols, sharp teeth, a scantily clad elven scholar and there might be a behemoth somewhere in there. This story is for mature readers, 18 and up. Avast! There be elves in these waters!